Emmett's St Patrick's Day
by dazzleglo
Summary: This is what happens when you watch TV commercials, you end up in Seattle at the St. Patrick's Day parade. Are the Cullen's and Swan's Irish? Find out in this fluffy humor filled one shot.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, but Stephenie Meyer's does.**

**This is a one shot of something that I just thought of and wanted to share. There is a parade in Seattle.**

**A special thanks to nails233 for encouraging me to write. BTW, you should check out her stories, they're awesome.**

**Emmett's Happy St. Patrick's Day**

**Emmett's POV**

Watching television with my lovely niece is always the highlight of my day. The family finally trusted me to take care of her alone. How they didn't before was just ludicrous because nothing ever happened on my tour of duty. I think Edward feared that I would teach her bad stuff or get into trouble. Well that never happened, mostly.

"Uncle Em, what is St. Patrick's Day?" she asked while pointing at the television.

"That's a day that the Irish people celebrate every year on March 17 with parades."

"Are we Irish?"

"We most definitely are because the Cullen crest has shamrocks on it."

"Really? Then we can go to a parade like the one advertised on television?"

"Of course we can." Then her face got very sad looking and her little lip was starting to tremble. "What's the matter Ness?"

"Umm, but what if mommy isn't since she's a Cullen by marriage. Can she still go?"

"She can still go, anyone can go. In fact, on St. Patrick's Day everyone is Irish for the day. But just so we know for sure, how about we call Grandpa Charlie and find out."

I quickly dialed Charlie putting the phone on speaker.

"Hello."

"Hey Chief, this is Emmett and your lovely granddaughter."

"Hi Grandpa."

"Hi Ness, Em. What's up guys?"

"We were just discussing St. Patrick's Day and we were wondering if there were any Irish relatives in your family tree."

"Hmmm, let me think for a minute." Ness was holding her breath in anticipation. "Yes, Bella's grandmother's mother was married to a man who was part Irish."

"YAY, mommy's Irish. We can now go to the parade." Ness cheered.

"What's this about a parade?" The Chief sounds intrigued and I got a great idea.

"There is a St. Patrick's Day parade in Seattle tomorrow."

"Can we go, can we go Uncle Em? Can the whole family go, you too grandpa." How could I say no to that sweet excited face.

"Sure we can go. You in Chief?"

"Please, please grandpa." She begged. I heard him groaning, just like Bella with the 'please' word.

"Of course I'll go honey. What time are we leaving tomorrow?"

"I'll send Alice over to pick you up in a half hour. We'll drive to Seattle tonight and stay over, make a whole family gathering out of it. Don't worry, the trip is on me."

"Okay, I'll be packed and ready. I love you Ness, can't wait to see you later."

"I love you too grandpa."

"Luv ya gramps." And all I heard before he hung up was 'crazy guy.'

I quickly dialed our favorite hotel in Seattle, The Edgewater Hotel. It was located right on Pier 67 overlooking the sound and centrally located. After making the reservations for everyone's rooms, it was time to let the family know about our exciting trip.

"Let's go find everyone and tell them about the parade and trip. Okay Ness?"

"Yes, Aunt Alice is going to be so happy, she can pack for everyone." I'm not sure happy was going to be her reaction since she couldn't shop for it too, but she could shop in Seattle.

My Rosie just walked in as we stood up. "Hi my angel," I leaned over and kissed her. "I've arranged for the family to go to Seattle tonight for the parade tomorrow. We're staying at the Edgewater."

"Wow sounds like fun. I love the Edgewater. Does everyone know yet?"

"No, we're just on our way to tell everyone. Want to come with?" More support is always good.

"Of course." She snaked her arm around my waist and we went out to find the rest of the family.

We found Emse in her garden with Carlisle helping her. "Hi grandma and grandpa."

"There's my sweet granddaughter, come to grandma." She swept Ness up into her arms placing kisses on her cheek. Carlisle came over put his arms around both of them and kissed both of them.

"My two favorite ladies." He smiled at them.

I cleared my throat, "Hi mommy and daddy. I love you. Don't I get a kiss and hug?"

"Of course you do son, now come over here so I can hug you properly." Esme beamed putting her arm out, I flew over.

I loved being hugged by my mom it made me feel all warm and fuzzy. I don't know why the others weren't so open to it. Although, Alice was a total daddy's girl, she would suck up to Carlisle like nobody's business. Bella just loved both of them like they were her parents, calling them mom and dad every chance she had. I could always see the look of happiness in their faces when she did that. Even Edward was starting to come around mainly due to Bella, but the day Ness questioned him about why he didn't call them mom and dad was the turning point. That was the funniest conversation ever.

_Flashback: _

_We were all sitting in the living room, Ness on Edward's lap and Bella next to him when out of nowhere Ness asked, "Daddy, why do you call grandma and grandpa by their names when they're your mommy and daddy?" _

_The look on his face was priceless over the innocent random question. And Bella leaned away looking at him the same way Ness did waiting for him to answer._

"_Err…well…um…see we always called them by their names." Ness was now thinking very hard about his answer._

"_Then can I call you Edward and mommy Bella?" We all could barely hold in our laughter. Edward on the other hand looked like he was going to faint. He loved being called daddy. Every time she said it, his face glowed with pride._

"_Emmett, as much as I'm sure you'd be thrilled and provide you with unlimited jokes if I did, I can assure you that I'm not going to faint."_

"_Oh no baby, I love being called daddy and I know mommy likes being called mommy too."_

"_Well if you like it then grandma and grandpa would like it too. They probably are upset that you don't, but they're too nice to say anything." If the smiles on mom and dad's faces were any bigger and happier, they would have cracked in half._

"_You're right Ness. I guess I just thought we were all old enough to use their names. I'll call them mom and dad again because I don't want them to be sad." It didn't get by me that his wording was forcing everyone else to do the same. Thing was that it didn't affect me because I was already doing that._

_Mom then rushed over with her arms outstretched while Bella pulled Ness from his lap, "oh son, that makes me so happy to hear. I love you so much," mom gushed throwing her arms and self around Edward kissing his face several times. He looked a bit shocked, but soon put his arms around her too._

"_I love you mom. Sorry I didn't realize." And mom's face was beyond anything I had ever seen. There was no denying he was her favorite. When I thought that he looked over and smirked at me. 'We all know, it's no secret bro. About time you realized how much mom needs this from you. You're her baby boy, always will be too.'_

"_Daddy I love you and grandma too." Ness threw herself at them kissing both of them._

_I couldn't help myself and I ran over hugging everyone sobbing, "Oh my brother, mom I love you too." _

_End Flashback._

"Emmett, what is it that you would like?" Carlisle eyed me warily.

"Whatever do you mean?" I feigned innocence.

"Every time you call us that, you want something."

"That's not entirely true."

"We're all going to Seattle tonight for the parade tomorrow. Grandpa Charlie is coming," Ness blurted out.

"Um…yeah, that's what I was going to tell you. I've made all the arrangements so that we can go."

"Okay, let me call the hospital to tell them I'm taking tomorrow off." Carlisle said. I was a little surprised he wanted to go.

"Dear, this is going to be really nice, a mini family vacation. What a great idea Emmett," Esme practically squealed.

Just then Alice and Jasper flew through the tree line on their way back from a hunt.

"Emmett Cullen! What's this about a trip to Seattle with no warning? And why do I have to pick up Charlie?"

"A…well…we…"

"Auntie Alice, we saw it all on TV just now. Please can't we all go? We'll have so much fun. You can shop in Seattle." Ness said giving her the puppy dog look.

I gave her the puppy dog look too. "Okay, okay, I give. Jasper and I are in, but someone else has to pick up Charlie. I can't be packing for everyone and do that too," she huffed.

"I'm sure we can pack ourselves." She looked at me as if I had ten heads, should have known better.

"You guys would pack all the wrong stuff. No way am I letting that happen."

"Okay pixie, don't get your underwear in a bunch. Jasper can go instead."

"Hey, do I seriously have to be cooped up in a car with a human. Do you really think that's such a good idea?"

"You just hunted. What the heck?"

"Do you want to take the risk? Besides its Edward's father-in-law, he should go."

"Good point. I just need to tell them we're going."

"I'll call them over right now." Jasper dialed the phone. Alice took off in a flash carrying on that she didn't have enough time to pack and that this no shopping was going to kill her.

"Hi Bella, can you come up to the main house with Edward?"

"We're kind of busy right now."

"It's important, family meeting. You two can continue kissing later."

"Umm…okay, be there in a sec." They arrived about two minutes later. Edward didn't look happy at all.

"So now that we're here what's going on and why is everyone blocking me?"

"DADDY," Ness screamed and ran into Edward's arms. "We're going to Seattle for the St. Patrick's Day parade."

"What? We don't celebrate it. We're not Irish sweetie."

"Everyone's Irish on St. Patrick's Day. Mommy's Irish, grandpa Charlie said so and that means I'm a little Irish too. Uncle Em said we were because of the shamrocks on our crest." Dude seriously didn't stand a chance against her. When will he ever learn that?

"I heard that Emmett. Not true."

"You keep telling yourself that bro, maybe it will come true one day," I laughed and he couldn't help but smile.

"Please, please daddy. The whole family's going even grandpa Charlie."

"Please, please Edward," Bella chimed in sticking her lip out and batting her lashes at him.

I thought to Edward, _'dude give it up now, totally not worth the fight. You're hopelessly outnumbered. It will be fun, you remember fun. Your ladies will think you're the best.'_

"Yes, we'll go. As long as Alice says the weather is good. When do we leave?"

"Alice said the weather will be fine. We're going to leave tonight, right after you pick up Charlie."

"What! You want me to pick up Charlie. He hates me. Still thinks I was inappropriate with Bella before we were married and hasn't forgiven me for you know what."

"What would that be little brother?" Bella was now snickering.

"You know perfectly well what." He discreetly pointed to Ness indicating that Charlie thought his granddaughter was conceived prior to their marriage. I couldn't help but grin at his uncomfortableness.

"Well then, this will be your opportunity to make nice with him. Maybe stick out the olive branch and pull him over to the vamp side."

Bella was now all out laughing, "the…vamp…side? Never heard of it, is it like the 'dark side?' Do we have any cool sayings like 'the force will be with you' or 'beware of the vamp side.' Oh I know, I know 'there is a great disturbance in the vamp world because of St. Patrick's Day,'" she snorted. We were all laughing like hyenas.

Bella was such a hoot and a half. Edward sure did pick the right person. Even though it didn't look like it, she loosened him up a lot. Before, he was just an intolerable stick in the mud.

That's when Carlisle chimed in, even he was having fun with this, so in a very deep James Earl Jones voice he said, "Edward, I am your father." And that's all he could say before he cracked up in hysterics with the rest of us. Even Edward was laughing.

"All right, no more bad Star Wars references. I'll go pick up Charlie now. I'll be back in a bit love." He kissed both Ness and Bella before leaving.

**Edward's POV**

For heaven's sake we're not Irish, are we? Now Ness thinks we all are because of the crest. Truth was I had no idea. Where does Emmett come up with these ideas? Not to mention he always seems to suck us all into them with him. I couldn't resist the 'please' pleadings of both my daughter and wife. However, what sealed the deal was Bella sticking her lip out at me. If we weren't in front of the family I would have attacked her lips with mine. No one could have pulled me off her lips then.

I arrived at Charlie's. Went up and knocked on the door. He came out with his bag.

"Hi Chief."

"Hi Edward, where's Alice? She was supposed to pick me up."

"There was a change in plans because Alice needed to pack for everyone. She claimed we wouldn't know what to bring."

"I see. She's a bit controlling about clothing."

"You don't know the half of it. Don't be surprised if she has packed some stuff for you too," I laughed.

The car ride was quiet and I decided to break the ice. Extend the olive branch so to speak.

"I'm glad you're coming with us. It's going to be nice to have a family getaway."

"Well I have to say I was surprised when Emmett called me. He and Ness wanted to know about the family heritage. I think they would have been disappointed if there weren't any Irish ancestry. I have no idea why it was so important to them."

"I'll admit Emmett is a bit odd. They saw a commercial for the parade. Then all those questions came up." _'odd is putting it mildly.'_

"All I know is that when Ness begged me with the 'please' word I totally caved. She is so much like her mother. Bella used to do that to me all the time." I couldn't help but grin at that.

"I know what you mean, I wasn't sure about going, but they both unleashed the 'please' word on me. I didn't stand a snowball's chance in Florida." We both laughed and I thought my wife's sweet pouting lip that didn't help me either. Charlie didn't need to know that though.

"You should know it's an inherited trait with the Swan women. Best not to ever fight it, you'll lose every time."

"I figured that out, but not before Bella and I had a few fights while we dated. I crumbled like a house of cards when she unleashed it on me. At first I had no idea what made me crumble, but then I figured it out."

"You know Edward, I don't hate you. Right?" How do you respond to that? Why does he make me feel like a seventeen year old boy in trouble?

"I sort of do." I sheepishly admitted.

"Well I don't, not anymore. I see how you two look at one another and I know you're meant to be together. You make Bella happy, and as a father, that's all that is important. Something you'll find out someday with Nessie." _'Wait until his little girl is with a boy, he's going to freak out from here to the moon.'_ Oh how right you are Charlie. I already know the boy too, Jake. Although, I have to say it's not a bad thing because he can live forever.

"Thanks Chief, I appreciate you saying that. I love both my girls so much. I can't even imagine my life without them or what it was like before. It would be nice if we could do some family trips and things. I know Bella and Ness would love it too."

"Edward, I want you to call me Charlie. I think that's long overdue and I want to be a part of my daughter's family which includes you."

"Thanks Charlie. It's just too bad that with your daughter's family you get Emmett too and he's strange to say the least." We both laughed over that one and I couldn't help but feel this was some serious progress. God help me Emmett was right. I was never going to hear the end of it.

"I sort of figured that out this afternoon when he called me 'Gramps' and told me he loved me."

"Just be warned that is what Emmett does when he wants something."

"Not to worry, he has nothing on Bella and Nessie, they are the true professionals."

We arrived at the house to find what looked like mass chaos, but it was just Alice directing everyone with the luggage into the cars.

"Did I forget to mention you get Drill Sergeant Alice."

"I heard that Edward Cullen. Now get over here and help." She stood there hands on hips tapping her foot.

"Yes Ma'am." I mocked saluted her.

"Good as long as you know who is in charge. Now go help Jasper."

"Sorry Charlie, I've been drafted."

"No problem Edward, I'll just go over and say hello to my girls."

**Emmett's POV**

"About time you guys got here. Now, Alice and Jasper car one, Mom, Dad, Rose and I in car two, and Edward, Bella, Ness and Charlie car three. GO, GO, GO people, time's a wasting."

We made it to Seattle in no time without speeding too much. That just wouldn't have flown with the Chief. We checked into the hotel and while we were in the elevator to our rooms took the opportunity to inform every one of our schedule.

"Okay people listen up, this is our schedule. Tonight you are free to do whatever. Tomorrow we will meet in the lobby at 9am and head to the parade route. And, most importantly, do not forget to wear your green paraphernalia that has been sent to your room."

"Why is everyone staring at me?" Edward inquired.

"Because dear brother, you are always the one to go against the grain, so get with the program. I don't want any lip from you."

He rolled his eyes, "I wouldn't dare go against you. We are here to have fun."

"Did Edward Cullen just say 'fun'? I'm living in an alternate universe, maybe I died. Quick somebody pinch me."

"OUCH! WHAT THE HECK ALICE."

"You asked for someone to pinch you, so I did."

"You're just getting even for not being able to shop?"

"Maybe…..Maybe not." She sing-songed while evilly grinning at me. They were all laughing at my expense.

**Bella's POV**

I couldn't believe Emmett planned all this and even had my dad coming. I was so happy that we were all doing this together. Unfortunately, Jake couldn't make it because he couldn't miss any more school otherwise he wouldn't graduate. I told him that if this turned out to be fun that we'd do it again next year and he could come with us. I knew it would be tough to be away from Ness, but they had done it before so I knew he'd be okay. They would talk on the phone.

We had a great dinner with my dad in the hotel's restaurant. He doesn't ask why we don't eat knowing it's a 'need to know' thing. However, we discovered that Ness loves chocolate cake. We just never thought to have such things in the house, but when he gave her a bite of his she wanted more, so he then ordered her one of her own. But not before looking at Edward and I stating 'grandpa's prerogative.' She ate the entire thing and was proud as a peacock over it. We laughed over her having chocolate all over her face. She so looked like a child.

Edward enjoyed every moment even wiping her face off. He didn't flinch once with the smell. It seemed that he and my dad were getting along too. He called him Charlie which shocked me. When we entered our two bedroom suite, I was very nervous. I was a married woman and yet I was scared to go in the bedroom with my husband.

"Bells, I'm exhausted. I'm heading to bed. Coming Ness?"

"Yep, grandpa." She kissed us goodnight and skipped off with him.

I looked at Edward, and he at me. "Ready for bed love?"

"Umm..aaa…wel.." I stuttered.

"Oh sweetheart, it's okay, you're dad knows we're married and we sleep in the same bed."

"I know but…." I waved my hands.

He smiled that crooked smile and I practically melted into goo, "You know if you were human you'd be beat red right now." Brushing my check with the back of his hand, I leaned in and closed my eyes. He was right, I would be. Then he leaned over breathing his scent over my neck, then reaching up and kissing my desperate lips. What was I thinking? I threw my arms around him and wound my fingers into his hair. I don't know how or when, but we were now in the bedroom.

The next morning we all dressed and met Emmett downstairs. Everyone had on a green t-shirt with shamrocks with a customized saying.

Ness – Irish Cutie Pie McCullen

Dad – McSwan Security Leprechaun Bouncer

Alice – Magically McCullen

Jasper – Irish McCullen Training Camp Counselor

Emmett – McCullen Tip of the Day: Don't Drink Green Beer. It's Leprechaun Pee.

Rose – Kiss me I'm Irish…and really sexy too

Esme – Property of a McCullen Man

Carlisle – Property of a McCullen Lady

Me – I Kissed a McCullen and Liked It

Edward – I'm the McCullen She Kissed

"Okay McCullen's and McSwan's, I have some more things to add to your outfits."

"Here are everyone's shamrock necklaces, now pin these buttons to your shirts." It read 'Kiss Me I'm a McCullen or in my dad's case McSwan.'

As soon as Edward pinned his onto his shirt, I tackled his lips.

"Hey, hey, knock that off over there." Emmett demanded.

"What? I'm just doing what the button says. Besides I kissed a McCullen and liked it," I giggled wiggling my eyes brows at him. Edward was grinning and then attacked my lips declaring, "just doing what the button says."

"Wise guys. Here are the crowns for the ladies and the gentlemen's hats." The crows were green and in the intricately woven pattern it said 'Irish Princess.'

"Emmett, these look like…I'm not sure what they look like, but I think you'd see these in Vegas." Edward said as he scrutinized the hat. They were green velvet fedoras with green, orange and white feathers in the side of the band and a large shamrock on the front.

"Oh honey, put it on, you'll look so cute." I encouraged while biting my lip. He looked very sexy actually and I think my eyes may have glazed over.

"Daddy looks pretty," Nessie exclaimed.

"No honey, girls look pretty, boys look handsome."

"Emmett where's my pimp mobile to go with this hat?" Jasper snickered.

"Emmett where's your hat?" I asked wondering why he didn't have one.

"It's right here and because I'm so awesome to have organized this, I needed special hat." He pulled out this huge green and white hat that looked like something the mad hatter's would wear. However, that wasn't before he attached the fake orange beard.

I broke out in laughter, "Em…mett you look hysterical." Rose didn't look fazed by it, clearly she has become accustom to his craziness.

"I'm awesome and no making fun of the McCullen who knows how to party down with you Bella." My eyes went wide; surely he wouldn't let out my secret. Edward would surely have a coronary if he heard I was partying with the wolves up at the main house. I needed to save myself.

"Oh come on, we all know you are awesome and planned this fabulous trip for us. Love you brother dearest," I pouted at him and that quickly brought a smile back to his face.

**Emmett's POV**

After handing everything out, we were ready to get going, but not before I threatened to let Bella's secret out. Edward would freak if he knew. She was good though as she countered me with the 'love you brother' line. She knew how to lay it on thick just like me. Edward had no idea who he married, but I did. She was fun and it was like looking in a mirror to a certain extent.

"Okay lads and lassie's enough of the shenanigans, time to get o'moving. Let's GO, GO, GO, time to party on McCullen style." Geez getting these people going is like trying to get a turtle to run.

We walked the few blocks and the spot I arranged was all set. "This is our spot, so everyone move inside the taped area."

"Should I ask how you did this with all these people here? That there are no reserved spots, but we have one, do I want to know?" Carlisle inquired quirking an eyebrow.

"Ummm, definitely not and neither does the Chief over there. Let's just say I have connections. I know people, they know people, and it's all very hush, hush. And if I tell you then I'll have to kill you."

Carlisle rolled his eyes at me, but I caught Edward disguising his laugh in Bella's hair. "I surrender, I don't want to know. By the way, you sound like you're connected to the mob."

"As if, but that'd be pretty cool though."

We watched the parade. Seeing all that marching bands was nice, not to mention the people watching. They were walking around dressed up just like us and it was fun.

After it was over the people on the streets continued to party, but we needed to head back.

"Hey guys, I hope you all had a good time."

"Uncle Em, this was so much fun. Thank you for taking us. I love my new sunglasses, we match. Did you see I got to sit on daddy's shoulders?"

Ness was all excited over the giant green sunglasses I bought from a street vendor for us. Edward was happy as a clam having his daughter on his shoulders like all the other dads. Now that I think about it this was the first time any of us have done a normal human public event together. She even told people that spoke to her that this was her daddy which made his eyes sparkle.

"The military precision of the bands was excellent." Jasper stated.

"Oh, I have so many ideas for outfits for next year." Next year? Alice wants to go again?

"My sweetheart, this was a really nice weekend. I hope we do it again." My lovely Rosie gushed placing a loving kiss on my ready lips, then whispering to me, "I like the beard, it's so you."

"We had a wonderful time my son, come give your mom and dad a hug." _'I'm the favorite today Edward, suck it up bro.'_ I thought to him. Yeah I was gloating.

"Emmett, I have to say this was an interesting experience, thank you for inviting a McSwan to the McCullen outing," the chief laughed. "So same time next year?"

"Yeah, this McSwan/McCullen had a great time. Next year we'll have to plan it out more so Jake can come." Even Bella wanted to come again.

"You know me o'bro, I love o'you." Edward said running up and throwing his arms around me in a bone-crushing hug declaring. "I'm kissing you because you're Irish. So next year can we be the O'Cullen's?" I was stunned into silence.

**HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY TO YOU!**


End file.
